Lessons from the Almost-30 Era
Turning 30 this year, I’ve been learning things I never had to face before.
Life gets messy. You build routines, expecting them to fix everything, and they do — kind of. But not to the root of the problem. Some habits fall apart halfway, and suddenly, you don’t even want to do them anymore. Some days, all you want is to lie in bed and take a long, deep nap in the middle of the day, hoping that when you wake up, things will somehow make sense.
This era has taught me that moving to another city or country won’t magically fix anything. Because no matter where you go, the problem follows — you carry it within you. I’ve realized that not everything can be solved immediately. Some problems need time. Some don’t get solved at all. And that’s okay. Not every question has an answer. It’s okay to be clueless about what life holds next.
Boundaries, Growth & Letting Go
One of the biggest lessons in this phase of life? Boundaries save you from unnecessary headaches. Learning to say, “I’m not available right now. I’ll talk to you when I’m ready,” is a game changer.
At this point, I no longer care about how big or small my circle is. If we vibe, we talk. If we don’t, that’s fine too. I’ve learned to say yes to opportunities but also to walk away when something no longer serves its original purpose. I don’t want to burn bridges or cut people off impulsively like I might have in my early 20s. Instead, I try to find a middle ground, a way to part without unnecessary drama.
And forgiveness? I’ve learned that forgiving doesn’t mean forgetting. It’s possible to move forward while acknowledging the pain. Problems aren’t just about what others did; they’re also about my own reactions, mistakes, and blind spots. The world doesn’t revolve around me — everyone has their own lives, their own loves and struggles.
Healing Isn’t What I Thought It Was
Healing isn’t about keeping myself busy or distracting my mind. Sometimes, it’s just about sitting with myself and accepting things as they are. Accepting reality doesn’t make me weak — it means I understand that life is unpredictable, imperfect, and messy. Perfection only exists in the mind, and trying to force it in real life is exhausting.
I’ve realized healing isn’t about erasing the past but about understanding how it shaped me. Growth isn’t linear. I’ll mess up. I’ll fall back into old patterns. I’ll react before I process. But self-awareness means catching myself faster each time. That’s progress. That’s healing.
At the end of the day, healing isn’t about looking healed. It’s not always pretty or Instagram-worthy. It’s raw, uncomfortable, and unglamorous. Most people avoid it. But the ones who don’t? They become unstoppable.
